By Sajid Iqbal & Alveena SalimSo you’re married. You’ve completed one half of your Deen. You’ve got your parents off your back and now you’ve got a lifetime to look forward to with the love of your life. You’re sorted innit? Ah, but are you clued up on the rights your partner has over you and the rights you have over your partner? Yep, ‘rights’! In order to make your marriage a success Allah (swt) has prescribed a list of guidelines for husbands and wives, which if followed properly can lead to marital bliss and fewer nights banished to the sofa.
Islam teaches that marriage is ‘half of Deen’ because it fulfils so many basic needs of an individual and of society. But y’ know, most of the problems in Muslim families nowadays are to do with marriage, coz we don't have a clue how to get married Islamically and as a Muslim partner what our rights and responsibilities are. Well ladies & gents, don't worry, as you will learn all this right here, right now!
So what rights does the wife have over the husband?Islam has honoured woman and granted her an equal status with man. It's only ignorance and cultural practices that prevent women from receiving the rights that they’re entitled to. It was Islam and not the Spice Girls that brought true Girl Power to women alright!
1. A wife has a right to choose her husband. If she doesn’t want to get married to someone her parents want her to marry then she has a right to refuse. So no woman can be forced to get married in Islam - this is her basic right!
2. If she doesn’t like her husband due to valid reasons then she may also get a divorce and re-marry someone else. Similarly, a widow may re-marry someone else as well.
3. She has a right to be a lady of leisure. Yep, seriously! In Islam, a husband has a duty to provide for his wife and should not force her to work to earn money- this includes clothing, food, accommodation and general care etc, and she should not be forced to work to earn money. She also has the right of Mahr (wedding gift) and inheritance. However, if she chooses to work, any money that she earns is her own and she has a right to spend it as she wishes. Now that is what I call Girl Power!
4. She has a right to keep her surname. Nowadays most women across the world lose their surname to their husbands' name, but Islam gives the wife the choice and power to keep her surname. How cool is that?
5. She has a right to be treated with kindness. Allah (swt) knows that by nature woman are more sensitive and gentle. This is why the Prophet told men to treat their women nicely. (Tirmidhi)
The Prophet advised men:
"The best amongst you, are the best for their wives, and I am the best of you for my wives." (Tirmidhi)
What rights does the husband have over the wife?Of course, men have rights too. It’s not all about the women y’ know!
1. A husband should be respected by his wife in every way. Unless of course it conflicts with an Islamic obligation or goes against an Islamic teaching.
2. The husband has the right to a trustworthy and honest companion. (The same here goes for the wife too). For example, she should not lie about using birth control to stop him having a child... that would be naughty now wouldn't it?
3. The husband has a right to sexual intimacy with his wife. She should not refuse him this right – unless of course refusal is due to medical reasons in which case the husband should be caring and considerate. As they say, if you don't get any action at home, you're gonna play away. So this is in reality a right and responsibility for both the husband and wife.
4. If the husband doesn’t like someone, then the wife shouldn’t allow them to come to their house, she also shouldn’t accept presents from such people. This is to avoid jealousy and friction between the couple.
5. The husband's possessions are his wife’s trust. She needs to safeguard his property and possessions. The Prophet said:
“The woman is the guardian of her husband’s house and is responsible for it.” (Bukhari)The reward for fulfilling these rights is immense! The Prophet said:
“Any woman who dies while her husband is pleased with her, she will enter Jannah.” (At-Tirmidhi)Thanks to : http://www.therevival.co.uk